Selling Issue: Your Manager
Managing Your Manager: The Clues to tell you
how to Create a Better Working Relationship with Your
Manager
by Maura Schreier-Fleming
Maura Schreier-Fleming works with business and sales
professionals on skills and strategies so they can sell more and be more
productive at work. She is the author of Real-World Selling for
Out-of-this-World Results. She is the principal of Best@Selling and can be
reached at info@BestatSelling.com or
972.380.0200.
There's good news and bad news if
you want a better working relationship with your manager. The good news is
it's possible. The bad news is it might take some work. Managers who
like the people they work with are easier to work for. So how can you get
your manager to like you? Think of your manager as a customer.
Then use some selling science as part of your selling strategy. The
science of selling can help you understand managers and how they select
the people they like. Their preferences start with
rapport.
What is rapport? Rapport is the feeling you get when you have an environment of trust
and understanding. The best salespeople are very skilled at creating
rapport. Fortunately, rapport is a skill that can be learned.
Rapport is critical for a good working relationship with your manager.
This feeling leads to trust and the ability to be persuaded when people
feel comfortable with people who they perceive to be like
themselves. Your manager makes decisions about rapport based on
observable behaviors. For many of them, they decide on an unconscious
level. To create rapport with your manager, you consciously make
decisions about your manager's observable behaviors. Here are the
behavioral clues so you can identify them and use them to work more
effectively and build a good working relationship with your
manager.
Assertiveness and
Responsiveness The two dimensions of behavior that people use to
make decisions about rapport are assertiveness and responsiveness.
Assertiveness is how other people perceive us to be forceful or directive
over people or situations. Each manager is either comfortable with
assertive or less assertive behaviors. Responsiveness is how other
people see us as showing or hiding our emotions. Your manager is
either more responsive or more controlled.
Assertive Clues Have you ever noticed the
differences in customer handshakes? They range from “the fish” all
the way to “the bone crusher.” That’s your first assertive
behavioral clue. Assertive people have more firm handshakes than
less assertive people. Other assertive clues are: louder voices
(versus softer voices), quicker speech, faster walking, consistent eye
contact, decisiveness, more extroverted behavior, and commanding people
more than asking them. Less assertive people perform the opposite of
these
behaviors.
Responsive Clues Have you ever given a
presentation to a stone-faced customer? This is your first clue
about the responsive dimension. When a customer lacks facial
expressions this is a clue that the person is controlled or less
responsive. Other controlled behaviors are: less frequent hand
movements, less frequent nonverbal feedback, focusing on tasks rather than
people, speaking in a monotone voice, making decisions based on facts
instead of opinions, and a very inflexible view of time.
How
do you use these clues? First pay attention to your
manager's behavior. Try to gather as many behavioral clues as you
can. We are not robots or machines so your manager will exhibit some
less assertive clues as well as more assertive clues. This applies
to responsive behaviors as well. Weigh the evidence for both
dimensions and see where there is a preponderance of clues. That
will be the behavior that is most comfortable for your manager. To
create rapport, use the reverse Golden Rule. Treat others the way
they prefer to be treated, not the way you prefer. This means doing
more of the behaviors that your manager feels comfortable with. This
will create rapport and your manager will feel more comfortable with
you.
For
some of you, modifying your behavior even for short periods of time will
be a challenge. It will get easier over time if you practice
identifying and using the clues. The science of selling is in
establishing rapport. The art of selling is in the many ways in
which you can create rapport. Your manager may be your most
important customer to sell to.
To have Maura speak at your next sales meeting or
conference:
Please contact me:
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